By Carrie Williams
I’m outside by myself a lot, which means I am in my head a lot. It can be so easy to get consumed by your own thoughts, wants, desires, fantasies, regrets and future. I would fill my walks and hikes with “what ifs” and “what’s next”, not ever really focusing on what’s present.
I realized that living out alternative realities in my head was a dangerous slippery slope that needed confinement. Although I didn’t want to completely suppress my imagination, I knew I needed to change how and what I consistently thought about.
So I did, and I started focusing on the present moment, I started being more aware of what was directly in front of me. My outdoor outings were then flooded with introspective ideas and reflective moments of my daily behaviors, character patterns and what I saw outside. I felt this awakening and growth on the inside of me; and I began to feel proud of myself… Up until God nudgedly humbled me to go further.
I was in morning prayer and worship one day when God guided me to make a gratitude list. I do this often, but this day was different, I started writing down what, who and all I was grateful for and that’s when the revelation became apparent.
Yes, I was being present and held a deep self-awareness in my alone time but I was still consumed with “me”, I still made it all about “me.” My needs, my wants, my desires. When I would walk or hike outside, I wasn’t leaving room for others in my thoughts or prayers.
Gaining self-awareness is a beautiful and necessary practice but, if you’re not careful it can roll into a masked selfishness. When we get so inundated with our personal goals, it can be difficult to reverence and love other people and their personal situations. I needed balance.
I needed to reflect on my own personal opportunities for growth, keep a grateful heart, glorify God, and love others all while being present. That sounds mentally, spiritually and emotionally exhausting, I know, but it doesn’t have to be.
I asked God to reveal what he wanted me to know and do. In the words of Lauryn Hill from Tell Him, I prayed that he made me unselfish without being blind. Side note: this song is amazing, go listen if you don’t know it or haven’t listened to it in a while. Ok we’re back, I prayed for compassion, an open heart and wisdom to understand other people. I prayed to go and think beyond myself.
I’ve listed a few practices that have helped me to be more diverse in my thoughts and in my journey to being present everywhere I go, especially outside.
By Carrie Williams
Mind capturing the scenery
Gazing into nature is one of my favorite and most relaxing pastimes. Before I even think about taking out my camera, I take long blinks, trying to breathe in every moment of what I am looking at. I let go and appreciate where I am and how I got there. I leap into the moment with full awareness, my senses are heightened dramatically. The smell, sound, sight, atmosphere submerging my skin — it’s all a part of the experience of mindfulness.
I try to practice being still and allowing my mind to conjure up the history of what I am looking at. Whether it’s a forest, ocean, skyline, I think about the foundation of the scenery. How did it get here? How many souls have traveled through this space? What type of minerals am I standing on? Is it man made or did nature do its thing? How did it become this color or texture? What shape is it making? What mammals are affected? Can I touch it? Can I feel it? Can I reach it? Am I afraid of it? How is this place, or thing making me feel?
These questions are powerful because only you can answer them in that exact moment. It’s not about having the answers to those questions, but rather the thought process and keen mindfulness it takes to realize the answer.
Praying for strangers
Seems simple, eh? I was cheated on in a past relationship. Of course I was hurt and upset and it was the only thing I could think about for a while. I was asking God to heal me from it every day it seemed like. But I would still find myself thinking about my ex and the woman he cheated on me with, I went down this rabbithole of asking “why” and “what was wrong with me” and blah blah, you know, all those insecurities that appear when someone betrays your trust.
I didn’t know the woman personally but I knew who she was. One day, God told me to include her in my worship time with him which I thought was absolutely crazy. But I started praying for her, like I spoke her actual name – out of my mouth- for the first time- which was a big deal because I was so hurt and angry. I prayed for her well-being and for peace in her life. I eventually and if I’m being honest, reluctantly started praying for my ex as well. This went on for a few days/weeks maybe, I can’t remember the exact timeline but I do remember laughing to myself one random night like dang, when did I get healed? At this point, I hadn’t thought about them in so long and I didn’t have any emotions tied to the situation. God answered my prayer for healing by positioning me to pray for the people who hurt me, a divine cycle.
Even though they weren’t complete strangers, the power of prayer can release so much negative energy towards others. Energy that you may not even know existed. I pray for people all of the time now, when I’m walking or out somewhere…I whisper a prayer for healing in this man’s life, or comfort in this woman’s life, joy in the guy who’s walking his dog while on the phone, peace for the teenager who just walked passed me in the grocery store. Everywhere…
It’s a great way to practice mindfulness and you receive this sense of freedom from your own burdens.
When you pray for strangers, you’re:
- Teaching your subconscious how to react when dealing with people, known and unknown
- Demonstrating a selfless love and compassion
- Inviting the presence of God to fill the atmosphere and touch people beyond what you can see or imagine
- Disrupting the evil spirits from sabotage
- Becoming more aware and intune with your own heart
- Spreading the gospel and love of Jesus Christ
Pray for people, love people, try it and watch God move.
Changing what I consumed
What we watch, read, eat, say, listen to and who we surround ourselves with all affect the way we operate and our behaviors in this world. That’s not just my opinion, that’s the way our brain was designed. “We are exquisitely sensitive to our surroundings. Who we are depends heavily on where we’ve been” and what we’ve consumed along the way. Our brain processes information that it receives and sends it back to the body, which then affects our thought patterns (neurons) and actions.
What you feed your mind is what you will produce. So when you have alone time and want to delve in mindfulness, your thoughts will likely be tampered with emotions from that show you binged, anger from the news outlet you just watched, sadness from that love song you replayed 43 times the night before. You see, mindfulness doesn’t happen when you close your eyes and get in a quiet place. No it happens way before, to reach true mindfulness you have to be weary of what you’re consuming.
I made drastic changes in my life when it came to what I was feeding my mind and soul. That’s not to say I eradicated everything, but I needed to cleanse.
Try this:
- Reduce the time you spend on your phone or laptop.
- Change and/or reduce the type of music you listen to. If you know you have road rage, trap music will only amplify those feelings, remember our brain processes information and sends it back to us.
- Stop falling asleep to certain shows at night.
- Control your eating and intake habits, eating when you’re bored is common. That’s because we’re not being stimulated so our first and simplest reaction is to indulge. Replace the urge with something productive.
- Read something new that may challenge your beliefs and examine why they may challenge you. This will help you to stand firm in your convictions when adversity hits. You’ve heard the saying, if we don’t stand for something we’ll fall for anything.
- Watch your words. How do you speak to people? How do you allow others to speak to you? How do you speak or think about people in your head? Examine how you judge others and yourself.
- Monitor your time with people. We often take on the characteristics of others, the good, bad and everything in between.
Talking to God out loud
My favorite mindfulness practice is talking out loud to God. For me, it’s complete vulnerability and openness. It’s a chance to say exactly how I am feeling without judgement or holding anything back. Having a support system to talk to is very important but we tend to only share certain parts of us. I know there have been times where I shaped a story to what I wanted people to know, leaving out this detail, minimizing that detail. I haven’t always been completely transparent because of shame, guilt, afraid of being judged, etc. This is why I cherish talking to God out loud, I can say what I want and express it in the manner in which I feel, no filters necessary. My words aren’t eloquent, or dressed in christianese, it’s just me venting and releasing all of my righteous and unrighteousness. Seems simple, eh? Well it is.
When you disclose your true feelings to God and I mean really open up, those troubled feelings of shame and fear start to fade. And when they resurface, because they will (we’re human), you will know who to go to first. God will then give you the wisdom to invite other people in. When you go to God first, it makes it easier to open up to other people without feeling judged. God will also give you the wisdom to listen to others. Have you ever received advice from someone and they didn’t know they were giving it?
Talking out loud to God:
- Stops you from making irrational decisions
- Provides clarity
- Forces you to trust and rely on the holy spirit as your first choice (not momma, daddy, bes fran, cousin)
- Moves you closer to God
- Gives peace and contentment
- Helps you gain wisdom and discernment
- Creates a grateful heart
Try it, unashamed, even if you feel silly or lame at first. God hears you. God loves you. God wants to have a two-way relationship with you.
Just Do it
Mindfulness is a daily practice. It won’t happen overnight. You’ll forget to do it and it can often feel like a cycle. But persevere, hold yourself accountable. Give yourself grace. Find a scenic affair and continue the journey.
Mindfully yours,
Carrie
Love this! Very open and honest about feelings we have felt before! Being mindful and intentional is truly hard work but the benefits reaped outweigh it all.
Thanks Lauren! My best sense of mindfulness happens outside. Glad you enjoyed the post!
This is beautiful and very easy habits to create while on the path to mindfulness. Thank you for the vulnerability you shared and allowing us in your space. I can’t wait to see what’s next!
Absolutely! Vulnerability has always been tough for me and I hope it can inspire others. Thanks for the support as always Disa!!
This was so beautiful and eloquently written. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us ❤️
Thanks so much Jabriel!! I’m always trying to find more ways to be mindful, let me know if you try any of the practices!:)